Young Adulthood and Pathways to Eternal Marriage

Jason S. Carroll, the author of this chapter states, " Although societal attitudes are changing about marriage and the transition to adulthood, the Lord's prophets have always emphasized the importance of marriage according to God's plan. Despite the emphasis the Lord's prophets have always placed on forming celestial marriage relationships, we live in a time when many people see the path toward marriage in a different life." People in the world, choose to live together before they are married and to have inappropriate relationships before they are married. This chapter goes on to list some of the pitfalls of current dating practices. Here are a few that are listed: Pessimism about marriage, getting ahead before getting wed, hanging out and hooking up, and an acceptance of cohabitation. It is really tough living in a world where people do not have strong moral values. I want to have a forever family, so I choose not to participate in those things.

Another big section in this chapter is finding a choice eternal companion. I am not married yet, so I really enjoyed this section. The Lord's Prophets have taught these "principles of finding" and have centered them primarily on teaching young people. These principles are: 1. When they should seek to get married. 2. Whom they should seek as a marriage companion. and 3. How to date in ways that will most likely lead toward the formation of eternal marriage.

When? - We are to prayerfully consider the timing of marriage in our own lives. " Marriage may or may not come during young adulthood, but young people should prepare themselves so that they are ready when a right opportunity presents itself." We are to trust the Lord and have faith in His timing. It will happen, when you and the Lord feel that you are ready.

Who? - Finding your Eternal Companion vs. a soul mate. Maintaining a relationship requires work, patience, personal growth, compromise, commitment, and sacrifice. Instead of a desire to find a soul mate, our desire should be to become eternal companions with our spouse in this life. " Eternal Companions are different than soul mates. While soul mates are found, eternal companions are chosen and made. Two people become uniquely suited for each other as they go through the experience of life together and learn to adapt and grow in ways that make them a better fit with their spouse."

How? - Elder Oaks encouraged young adults to date rather than hang out. He counseled young adults to engage in traditional dating patterns that can lead to exclusive dating, engagement, and marriage. Elder Oaks also taught that the goal of traditional dates is conversation and interaction, not entertainment. "A traditional dating experience provides young adults with greater self- awareness, greater appreciation of the range of potential partners, and greater preparation for marriage, which leads to wiser decision making about a marriage partner and increased confidence in later courtship." Once the couple feels comfortable with traditional dating, they move on to exclusive dating. This should only happen when couples are exploring a potential marriage relationship and then they can come to a decision on whether or not they should move forward to an engagement. " This transition should happen with open discussion between the partners."