Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness.
Rearing children in love and righteousness- The following are crucial elements for each child, although specific implementations and approaches may be individualized based upon the needs and personality of each particular child:
- Love, warmth, and support
- Clear and reasonable expectations for competent behavior
- Limits and boundaries with some room for negotiation and compromise
- Reasoning and developmentally appropriate consequences and punishments for breaching established limits
- Opportunities to perform competently and make choices
- Absence of coercive, hostile forms of discipline, such as hard physical punishment, love withdrawal, shaming, and inflicting guilt
- Models of appropriate behavior consistent with self-control, positive values, and positive attitudes.
One of the assignments we did in my class was we took a parenting style test, I would recommend that every parent take this test, to see how they can improve and what they should change.
Elder Joe J. Christensen a member of the Seventy stated, " We should avoid spoiling children by giving them too much. In our day, many children grow up with distorted values because we as parents overindulge them... One of the most important things we can teach our children is to deny themselves. Instant gratification generally makes for weak people."
I really enjoyed this quote. Growing up, my parents always made sure that we had what we needed, and a little of what we wanted. I feel that my parents had a great balance in this and taught us how to work for the things that we want instead of just being given them.
Love
The first of the three characteristics of authoritative parenting is love, or connection.
President Gordon B. Hinckley stated, " Every child is entitled to grow up in a home where there is warm and secure companionship, where there is love in the family relationship, where appreciation one for another is taught and exemplified, and where God is acknowledged and His peace and blessings invoked before the family alter."
I grew up in a home, always knowing that I was loved. I knew because my parents told me and they showed me that they loved me. One thing that I struggle with is being able to tell my family that I love them. I love them, but I would rather show it than say it. I don't know why I don't say it, but I don't. It is one thing that I want to work better at doing.
Limits
The second element of authoritative parenting is limits, known in the scholarly literature as regulation.
"In authoritative homes, parents are clear and firm about rules and expectations. Authoritative parents take responsibility for setting the appropriate number of rules that can be realistically remembered and enforced. Some children may require more and varying types of rules and punishments than others, depending on their individual natures."
Latitude
The third component of authoritative parenting is latitude or autonomy. Children benefit from being given choices and appropriate levels of latitude to make their own decisions in a variety of domains.
Elder M. Russell Ballard shared, " Helping children learn how to make decisions requires that parents give them a measure of autonomy, dependent on the age and maturity of the child and the situation at hand. Parents need to give children choices and should be prepared to appropriately adjust some rules, thus preparing children for real- world situations."
I am very grateful to my parents for preparing my for real- world situations. When I came to college, I was so surprised to see how many people did not know how to do things for their selves. I was very self-efficient because my parents taught me to be.
I would like to end this post with one last quote from President Gordon B. Hinckley: ," Of all the joys of life, none other equals that of happy parenthood. Of all the responsibilities with which we struggle, none other is so serious. To rear children in an atmosphere of love, security, and faith is the most rewarding of all challenges. The good result from such efforts becomes life's most satisfying compensation."
No comments:
Post a Comment